Bancul Zilei

maryjan

neata

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Am fost cu copiii la unul dintre noile locuri de joaca ieri. Nu mai merg acolo niciodata...s-a lasat cu lacrimi, urlete si plansete.
M-am blocat intr-un tobogan si am avut un atac de panica!

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There were two evil brothers. They were rich, and used their money to keep their ways from the public eye. They even attended the same church, and looked to be perfect Christians.
Then, their pastor retired, and a new one was hired. Not only could he see right through the brothers' deception, but he also spoke well and true, and the church started to swell in numbers. A fund-raising campaign was started to build a new assembly.
All of a sudden, one of the brothers died. The remaining brother sought out the new pastor the day before the funeral and handed him a check for the amount needed to finish paying for the new building.
"I have only one condition," he said. "At his funeral, you must say my brother was a saint." The pastor gave his word, and deposited the check.
The next day, at the funeral, the pastor did not hold back. "He was an evil man," he said. "He cheated on his wife and abused his family." After going on in this vein for a small time, he concluded with,
"But, compared to his brother, he was a saint"

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You always hear about alpha males and beta males, but I'd prefer to be a gamma male.
They have a higher rate of penetration...

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You know what would be a hilarious prank?
Make people study for 18 years and don't give them a job.

HAIDUCUL1

Culmea globalizarii - Moartea printesei Diana:
O printesa engleza cu un amant egiptean are un accident intr-un tunel francez intr-o masina germana cu motor olandez, condusa de un belgian, care a baut wiskey scotian, urmarita fiind de paparazzi italieni, pe motociclete japoneze. Tu citesti asta pe un monitor corean, la un calculator taiwanez, cu tehnologie americana, asamblat de muncitori din Bangladesh, intr-o fabrica din Singapore, transportat de indieni, descarcat de sicilieni si vandut de romani.

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Am avut o iubită care era medic chirurg. Cand se supăra, tăia în carne vie.